What a complete and utter twallock

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sirprize
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What a complete and utter twallock

Post by sirprize » 07 Nov 2008, 14:19

Even HE has outdone himself in this edifice of cack http://cgi.ebay.com/Bechstein-White-Gol ... .m63.l1177. Will someone - anyone - please him out of his misery?

Gill the Piano
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Post by Gill the Piano » 07 Nov 2008, 14:53

I've read it....I may go and lie in a dark room for a while... :shock:

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Post by genaa » 07 Nov 2008, 18:02

reminds me of that Verve song "the drugs don't work"......................(nor, it appears, does care in the community for that matter!)

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Post by D Minor » 07 Nov 2008, 18:18

Thank you for that. I always love reading his listings...in very small dosings...5ml every few weeks is just right.

What's all this about including pics of young ladies recently? :oops: Next thing they will be draping themselves over the piano...

Thought about starting a new post on the forum here, but decided against it...so....

Just to say a quick Hello and many thanks to Barrie. I met him for the first time yesterday and he has done a marvellous job tuning my piano...Pianoguy...if you are reading this, it's the one that was replaced in regard to the sticky keys.

I think there was a posting way back about piano teachers tending to stay with one tuner. Well I have to say Barrie has just acquired another teacher on his books and I will be recommending him to all my pupils and friends.

See you again in 6 months, Barrie. I'll be a good girl and tune my piano more often :roll: You know what teachers are like!

I would once again like to express my thanks for the advice I have received and now the great service.

Best wishes to All.

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Post by Openwood » 07 Nov 2008, 19:19

To be fair, he really needs to take over Russell Brand's slot on Radio 2 with immediate effect.
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Post by pianotechman » 08 Nov 2008, 09:03

Crumbs, I gave up reading his bumph and went on to a shorter work....'War and Peace', for some light relief!
His stonemason is going to be able to retire after carving his eppitaph! :lol:
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Post by WinstonChurchill » 08 Nov 2008, 10:29

At least he has good taste in hockey teams!

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Post by Brumtuner » 08 Nov 2008, 11:04

I feel sorry for his milkman.

"More milk, the music of godlike warriors humming Oasis by an oasis which Himler sang there is a blonde girl to which a demigod of mega violet energy saving paranormal cascading down the long leg of a frauline Pauline and a loaf please."

Hope that didn't make sense.

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Post by mdw » 08 Nov 2008, 11:15

Theres another nutter asking people to pay £4k for a Challen similar to one played by the Beatles. NOT the one played by the Beatles but just the same model!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 260311958029 is the ebay number if you want a laugh. A financial crisis certainly seem to bring them out of the wood work.

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Post by NewAge » 08 Nov 2008, 11:34

Nuttier than a mad hatter, just about sums up this Raymanboy character.
Has anyone yet figured out what language he’s writing? It makes me think of Unwinese, developed by Stanley Unwin - who old timers like myself will recall was popular in the 50’s-60’s.

[/url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VlMmJfG0-bU

I get the impression that from all Raymanboy’s zero ebay bids currently shown, he could probably make more money writing new Monty Python or other tv comedy scripts than attempting to sell pianos.
Which makes me think of these musical related gems:-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLjS3gzHetA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btS7-UoK2Oo

Pianotuni deep joy, remarkabold!
I was playing the piano in a zoo, when the elephant burst into tears. I said, "Don't you recognize the tune?" He replied, "No, I recognize the ivories!"

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Post by NewAge » 08 Nov 2008, 11:42

I note that my previous http links were not active. Can anyone pls explain why?
I was playing the piano in a zoo, when the elephant burst into tears. I said, "Don't you recognize the tune?" He replied, "No, I recognize the ivories!"

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Post by genaa » 08 Nov 2008, 11:57

you need to enclose a link between a [.url] and [./url] code (with the fullstops taken out)

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Post by NewAge » 08 Nov 2008, 13:19

I was playing the piano in a zoo, when the elephant burst into tears. I said, "Don't you recognize the tune?" He replied, "No, I recognize the ivories!"

Gill the Piano
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Post by Gill the Piano » 08 Nov 2008, 16:52

Apparently none of those videos are available...:(
Mind you, my computer hates me; it might just be me.

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Post by Grenache » 08 Nov 2008, 20:51

mdw wrote:Theres another nutter asking people to pay £4k for a Challen similar to one played by the Beatles. NOT the one played by the Beatles but just the same model!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 260311958029 is the ebay number if you want a laugh. A financial crisis certainly seem to bring them out of the wood work.
This guy says the piano is "underdampened". Obviously not been out in the weather we've had this week :D

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Post by major corbin dallas » 13 Nov 2008, 12:11

This is a link to a Mercedes Car that he recently sold, or attempted to sell.

If you watch the video, it appears he is videoing whilst driving on public roads. Dangerous on the internet, and in real life.

Major


http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... t_4505wt_0

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Post by pianotechman » 16 Nov 2008, 09:59

Thanks to a couple of posters, I now know who 'Raymanboy' is. Some years ago, when he was trading in Berkshire, I went with a client to look at some of his pianos. The reconditioning was dire and then he showed her a dreadfull battered upright with a split wrestplank. Appart from telling her that it was perfectly tunable,[although the tuning crank spun back when you let it go!] he said it was the piano used in the 'Coca Cola' advert, and had belonged to a millionair. I said " I bet he was glad to get rid of this heap of c**p then!" At which point my client erupted into uncontrolled laughter. Raymanboy just carried on with his sales patter oblivious to what I'd said.......needless to say we didn't buy anything from him. Has anybody? :lol:
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Post by PianoGuy » 16 Nov 2008, 20:10

Judging by his feedback, many people have, and furthermore they appear satisfied!! Just goes to show how the huge number of crooks there are in the piano trade somehow appear to prosper.

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Post by David B » 16 Nov 2008, 22:04

PianoGuy wrote:Just goes to show how the huge number of crooks there are in the piano trade somehow appear to prosper.
speaking from experience, sir? 8)

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Post by PianoGuy » 16 Nov 2008, 22:10

I certainly am, matey.

It staggers me what rogue dealers get away with and how much some of them charge for it.

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Post by mdw » 16 Nov 2008, 23:12

Are these rogue dealers trained techs gone bad or just crooks who have decided the piano trade is the one for them. The local cowboy round our way has no training in the trade and just bought a few grotty straight strungs and decided to be a piano dealer.
It does seem to be a trade where people just decide " im going to be a piano expert" and the public seem to fall for it. And the more bull you put on you web site the better from what I can see.

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Post by PianoGuy » 16 Nov 2008, 23:37

[quote="mdw"]Are these rogue dealers trained techs gone bad or just crooks who have decided the piano trade is the one for them. [quote]

Some of each sadly.
And the semi-skilled who believe their own hype!

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Post by Gill the Piano » 19 Nov 2008, 17:33

...and the ones who think owning an electronic box of tricks qualifies them as a 'trained' tuner!

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Post by pianotechman » 19 Nov 2008, 17:54

Can't think for the life of me who you might be talking about Gill!
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Post by sussexpianos » 19 Nov 2008, 19:47

there are crooks in all trades. The main problem is that a lot of people dont know a good piano from a bad one and as such, trust the person selling it. If you get "What Piano" next month then all the answers will be answered, including "Whats wrong with my £50 online auction site piano?"

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Post by Pianomate » 03 Dec 2008, 19:54

Come on, it can't be real - these Ebay items have got to be a wind-up.

Is it just me or is anyone else wondering what the **** that ebay description is all about! If it's not a wind up he must have done way too many drugs.

That's nothing compared to what inane abortions he has listed at the moment. Take a look at this one -it really takes some beating! What a sad fate for such fine instruments.

http://cgi.ebay.com/Broadwood-Rosendor ... %3A1318

Judging by the feedbacks and comments from dissatisfied customers looks like he started by selling used cars.

Hmm....... The old (clapped out) piano in the village hall wants scrapping but I've got an idea -maybe I could list it on Ebay for £1,000 and state it is "similar" to the one played by Marge in "The Simpsons" cartoon.

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Post by mdw » 08 Dec 2008, 21:41

Another ebay fantasist. 300278456405 he seems to think "a french polisher can renew the finish with a couple of hours work". Looks like some ones eaten bits of it!!! Or look at his other items for sale. Mmmmm a lime green Baldwin upright niiiiiiiice. There should be a special section of the forum just for this sort of thing, always makes me laugh when the weathers grim. :lol:

I pay for a skip for this sort of crap so it never sees the light of day again.

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Post by Brumtuner » 08 Dec 2008, 23:35

Heyyyyyyy, my Fazioli is lime green.

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Post by MarkGoodwinPianos » 16 Dec 2008, 18:36

I emailed the seller of the piano in the opening post of this topic. I can't remember exactly what I said as it was a couple of months ago now but I was polite and said I enjoyed the auction description and wish him/her well in the sale.

I got a very enthusiastically written reply and remember thinking I'd love to spend an afternoon in a pub with this person.

:)
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email markgoodwinpianos@gmail.com with any Yamaha, Kawai, Bechstein or Steinway questions :)

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Post by Pianomate » 19 Dec 2008, 16:50

Too true, this listing doesn't even have a picture of the piano on it - just a girl!

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/DIE-PALETTEINEM-S ... 240%3A1318

I notice that it's listed under another seller alias but it's the same unmistakable drivel.
The seller has made it necessary for us to read all the description not part before both placing bid and asking questions.

Members are expected to have shown they have done this.
As if!! :roll:

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Post by Pianomate » 12 Jan 2009, 22:12

He's got (from about £10,000) dow to 99p with no reserve and there's still no bids. Looks like he's getting desperate to shift it!

LOL

:lol:
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ROSENDORFER-DREAM ... 240%3A1318

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Reverie » 20 Feb 2009, 21:46

Hello All,

Whilst perusing the site for about the third time (looking for a piano and some previously posted buying advice) I came across this thread... and oh how I laughed! Subsequently, I had to register immediately.
On my quest to find a piano I had a look around ebay to see if there were any hidden gems within the listings and came across the vendor in question.
Apart from losing the will to live, realising I had lost valuable minutes of my life never to be reclaimed, I wondered whether I had accidentally dosed myself up with some sort of brain-warping hallucinogenic. Out of a sense of good will, I thought I'd email the vendor to, primarily, see if they were 'alright' and proffer some feedback in a kindly fashion. The emails were as follows:
"Dear raymanboy,
May I ask why your listed items are so bizarrely and obscurely
described? Makes it very hard for anyone to decipher the facts
about the article you're trying to sell.
In fact.. it comes across as a bit strange.... Surely that's not your
intention, is it?
- reverie"

Reply:

"Dear reverie,
Hello
Thankoyu for your eMail. And I understand you are finding something strange in the listing. Will try to be of help - please tell us what it is you dont understand and will gladly explain.
Kind regards
- raymanboy

At this point I thought aww... they sincerely think I have comprehension issues and need a bit of 'help'.. then before I could respond, I got the following...

Dear reverie,
PS

It is the feedback which is the biggest issue we have lost with by eBay. This was not the intention of raymanboy and one/both comments were left against ebay Feedback Policy.
This has caused the change where we find many members place varied descriptions which still tell you nothing about the seller. Conversely you can see this seller has done the homework can't you - consider eBay should have corrected the feedback that in this they have let is down misserably.
Kind regards

- raymanboy

Can anyone else hear the voices? :shock:

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Pianomate » 21 Feb 2009, 10:21

It would appear that Raymanboy has several other new aliases on Ebay. The items and descriptions seem to be getting even more obscure. There's even a Bechstein piano painted like a butterfly. This guy really shouldn't have stopped taking the tablets.

On reading, the following would appear to not actually be a Bechstein piano. Surely this is against Ebay policy?

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/GERMAN-GRAND-DEUT ... dZViewItem

Doesn't look like his jibberish is helping his sales due to the fact he isn't managing to sell anything!

Regarding his car listings - would you honestly trust a guy like that to sell you a used car!
Last edited by Pianomate on 23 Feb 2009, 11:25, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by David B » 23 Feb 2009, 10:12

And curiously, he seems to think that a few pictures of Hitler will improve his sales :shock:

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by PianoGuy » 23 Feb 2009, 15:03

The fraudster also appears to be called "laddbrookes" (obviously trying to trade on an existing defunct piano company name) as well as "chelseadollshouseantiques".

He should be stopped before he hurts someone.
PG

The opinion above is purely that of PianoGuy and is simply the opinion of one person ....

If you're buying a piano, try as many as you can and buy the one you like, not a similar one of the same type.

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Pianomate » 21 Apr 2009, 01:35

Just when you thought they couldn't get any more weird:

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/A-Very-Grand-Pian ... 240%3A1318

They are like "spoof" listings.

Again another fake "Steinway" piano. Very dodgy, I'm sure.

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by PianoFifty » 21 Apr 2009, 02:28

Well, all I can say is the casework looks nice. But, as they say, "the smelliest dogs have the shiniest coats".......

But then I see 'Boston, Lincolnshire', and that explains everything. He's probably got webbed feet.

Oh dear, am I banned now?
All the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order......

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by David B » 21 Apr 2009, 09:05

I don't think that you lot can criticise unless you have read all the "sales literature" :shock:

I am sure that it will change your life :wink:

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Pianomate » 21 Apr 2009, 09:32

I wonder if the guy talks like the way he writes?

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by PianoFifty » 21 Apr 2009, 16:14

Check out his other listing on ebay - its just as batty:

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Biggles-Smoot-Sed ... dZViewItem

Anyone any ideas what that piano actually is?
All the right notes, but not necessarily in the right order......

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Gill the Piano » 21 Apr 2009, 16:51

Sorry; got as far as the Elgin Marbles then lost the will to live...
I play for my own amazement... :piano;

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Pianomate » 13 May 2009, 00:13

Found another listing - they keep getting even longer and more bizarre. I wonder if there is a limit to the amount of text you can put in an Ebay ad.
http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/C-BECHSTEIN-GRAND ... 1|294%3A50

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by NewAge » 13 May 2009, 06:51

Nuttier than a squirrel. And did you note his other offerings? Amongst others a Steinaway which some have actually bid on! (Quote:) "Beauty that here is that her prestigeous standing as such and by original Steinway's Elephant support the only surely true Steinway." :?
I couldn't have put it better myself.
A used straight-jacket being offered with every piano purchased?
I was playing the piano in a zoo, when the elephant burst into tears. I said, "Don't you recognize the tune?" He replied, "No, I recognize the ivories!"

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by PianoGuy » 13 May 2009, 07:50

Someone section him quick!
PG

The opinion above is purely that of PianoGuy and is simply the opinion of one person ....

If you're buying a piano, try as many as you can and buy the one you like, not a similar one of the same type.

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Gill the Piano » 13 May 2009, 17:24

I love the Letraset-stylee logo on the fall...when did Bechstein introduce that, I wonder?
I play for my own amazement... :piano;

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by sirprize » 05 Jun 2009, 16:59

Having inoocently to started this incomparable thread some undue aeons ago I see it has achieved insoumantable greatest as the most-perused thread in here.......

.......not that it has stopped him from continuing to post acres of dog-dung

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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by RichardB » 10 Apr 2010, 13:03

Hi, I'm from a car forum where Raymanboy is as much of a legend as he is here. I just thought I'd drag this thread up to let you know he's back. The name has changed again but I'm sure you'll agree it's definitely him.

Some people have observed that he doesn't say much about pianos in his piano listings. Here's a tip, read his Mercedes listing, it has all the piano content you could want. It's a bit light on Mercedes content bt you can't have everything. :wink:

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/my-real-passion- ... ksid=p4340


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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Colin Nicholson » 01 Mar 2016, 20:32

Must agree.... someone's cheese has slid off their cracker !
Mental issues?
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Re: What a complete and utter twallock

Post by Barrie Heaton » 01 Mar 2016, 22:06

Colin Nicholson wrote:Must agree.... someone's cheese has slid off their cracker !
Mental issues?
was there some cheese there in the first place

Sadly some poor sod will bite we have all been out to the Ebay rip offs

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